The 90 Second Rule

I stumbled onto the 90 second rule the other day and thought it was a keeper. Hope you enjoy it.




How do teams become champions? How do family teams endure life's trials and tribulations and ultimately thrive? Since 1974 Jim Fannin has taught a simple formula for success called the S.C.O.R.E.® System. It is a thought-management process for improving Self-discipline, Concentration, Optimism, Relaxation and Enjoyment. This thought-management system is used to create winning teams that include sports, business and families. As a "change your life" coach to the best athletes and corporate CEOs in the world, Jim has witnessed 75% of his clients' job performances were greatly impacted by the toughest arena of the world -- marriage.

He promotes the famous "SCORE" principle. Here it is.

SCORE
Self-discipline is paramount. A couple must be willing to attempt to individually repair their marriage. Each must take back as much control as possible of their limited private life. No past experiences need to be addressed initially. A moratorium on finger pointing, judgment or being a victim needs to be in force.

Concentration is required. Married couples need to focus on what they want and NOT what they don't want! Each need to write down a reasonable list, independent of each other, of what they want and expect in a significant other. This list includes: romance, social interaction, parenting, finances, careers, regular communication, etc. What characteristics do they want their significant other to have regarding these issues? This "wish list" should be all encompassing.

Optimism will be the glue that bonds their relationship. What part of their list will they compromise or sacrifice in order to make "1 + 1 = Her name here + His name here?" This will take great thought on each of their parts. This will be the true litmus test to their success or failure as husband, wife and family. They must see the relationship as it will be. They must see it as if it's so. Optimism is their belief and expectancy that the marriage will not only survive, but thrive. Each needs to see in their daydreams a life with each other. Shared vision brought them together and it will bring them back. The relationship is only as good as what each thinks about the other when they are apart.

Relaxation is being comfortable with each other, free from worry and anxiety. Find the common denominators that showcase a peaceful and tranquil "xxx family" under one roof. Will this be easy? Routines that both agree on will create the constants for this to happen.

Enjoyment is the bottom line and the end result. Enjoying one another's company when there is chaos around you is the challenge. Both people need to laugh together and rekindle their friendship. Intimacy will follow. Finally, both parties together need to discuss where change and compromise can take place. They need to enjoy this union of husband and wife.